Teaching on change
“You cannot make another person change. You can only change your state.”
Preethaji
Preethaji

The Power of Inner Transformation

Preethaji's assertion, "You cannot make another person change. You can only change your state," invites us to reflect on the profound nature of personal agency and the limitations of external influence. This quote emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and the recognition that true change begins within. In a world often characterized by attempts to control or manipulate others, this teaching serves as a gentle reminder that our focus should be on our own inner landscape, where transformation is not only possible but essential.

At its core, this quote challenges the common belief that we can shape the behaviors and attitudes of those around us. It underscores the futility of trying to impose our will on others, suggesting instead that the most effective way to influence our environment is through our own state of being. By changing our internal state—our thoughts, emotions, and perceptions—we can create a ripple effect that may inspire others to reflect and perhaps change in their own time. This perspective is crucial for fostering healthier relationships and a more harmonious existence.

The image / the metaphor

The imagery in Preethaji's quote evokes a sense of personal responsibility and empowerment. The verbs "make" and "change" highlight the active role we play in our own lives, while the phrase "your state" suggests a deep, intrinsic quality of being that is malleable and responsive. This metaphor of state implies that our emotional and mental conditions are not fixed; rather, they are fluid and can be transformed through conscious effort and intention.

In the speaker's tradition

Preethaji's teachings are rooted in the oneness movement, which emphasizes interconnectedness and the shared essence of all beings. This perspective aligns with concepts such as dharma, which refers to one's duty or path in life, and kenosis, the idea of self-emptying to allow for greater love and connection. By focusing on changing our own state, we engage in a form of inner dharma, recognizing that our personal evolution contributes to the collective consciousness.

Moreover, this teaching resonates with the Buddhist concept of sunyata, or emptiness, which suggests that our perceptions and attachments shape our reality. When we change our internal state, we begin to see the world through a different lens, one that is less clouded by judgment and more open to compassion. This transformative process is echoed in the teachings of various spiritual traditions, where the emphasis on inner change serves as a catalyst for broader societal shifts.

Living the teaching

Consider a modern scenario where this teaching might resonate: a workplace conflict. Imagine a team member who consistently undermines your ideas. The instinct may be to confront them or attempt to change their behavior through persuasion. However, by shifting your focus inward and changing your own state—perhaps by cultivating patience or empathy—you may find that your interactions with this person evolve. This internal transformation can lead to a more constructive dialogue, ultimately fostering a healthier work environment.

In a different context, think about a challenging relationship with a family member. Often, we may feel frustrated by their choices or behaviors, wishing they would change to align with our expectations. Instead of trying to control the situation, we can apply Preethaji's teaching by examining our own emotional responses. By nurturing a state of acceptance or love, we may create a space for healing and understanding, allowing the relationship to transform organically over time.

A reflection

As we contemplate Preethaji's words, we are invited to consider the ways in which we seek to influence others. Are we often caught in the cycle of wanting to change those around us, or can we redirect our energy toward our own inner transformation? In this light, a contemplative question arises: What state do I wish to cultivate within myself, and how might that influence my interactions with others?

Preethaji
ArtistPreethaji

Co-founder of the One World Academy and the global O&O Academy. Preethaji teaches the path to a 'beautiful state' — a stress-free inner life rooted in expanded consciousness and co…

Explore Topics

Got Questions?

Frequently Asked Questions

Preethaji emphasizes that true change must come from within an individual. Attempting to control or influence others often leads to frustration, as each person has their own journey and timeline for transformation. Instead, focusing on our own internal state allows us to create a more positive environment that may inspire change in others.
You can apply this teaching by shifting your focus from trying to change others to examining your own thoughts and emotions. For instance, in moments of conflict, ask yourself how you can adjust your perspective or emotional response to foster a more constructive interaction.
Yes, the concept of inner transformation as a means to influence the collective is prevalent in many oneness-movement texts. Authors often discuss the interconnectedness of all beings and how personal growth contributes to the greater whole, echoing Preethaji's insights.
Dharma refers to one's personal duty or path, while kenosis involves self-emptying to allow for greater love and connection. In the context of Preethaji's teaching, changing your state can be seen as fulfilling your dharma by embracing self-awareness and compassion, which aligns with the practice of kenosis.
Mindfulness meditation is a powerful practice that supports living this teaching. By cultivating awareness of your thoughts and emotions, you can more easily identify areas for personal change and develop a deeper understanding of how your internal state affects your interactions with others.
You may notice feelings of frustration or helplessness when dealing with others. If you find yourself frequently thinking about how others should behave or feel, it may be a sign that you are focusing on external change rather than your own internal state.

Continue Reading

Related Quotes

View All